I don't even know how to put this prayer request into words. I know God knows every word before we speak them, but lately I feel He doesn't hear me at all. I just want out of this life. The loneliness is unbearable. I feel like I'm screaming at the top of my lungs yet no one hears or cares or understands the realities of depression. Yet at the same time I have this overwhelming inability to clearly share my thoughts and feelings. There is just so much pain and misery in my life that I just don't see a way out. There is no light at the end of the tunnel. I know Gods light is always there but I just can't seem to find it. Everything in my world is complete darkness. I used to only feel this hopelessness and think about what it would be like if I wasn't here. It's gone a step further though and the thoughts are turning into suicidal ideation. Pray I find Gods light and that maybe He sends me someone or something to help. And that these thoughts go away and if they don't go away, that they just stay thoughts and not actions. Thank you.